NYC Letter: Big Stupid Satan

Here is an example of news that merits barely a yawn in the Western press:

IRAN GROUP SIGNS UP SUICIDE VOLUNTEERS

TEHRAN, Iran - The 300 men filling out forms in the offices of an Iranian aid group were offered three choices: Train for suicide attacks against U.S. troops in Iraq, for suicide attacks against Israelis or to assassinate British author Salman Rushdie.

On Nov. 12, the day Iranians traditionally hold pro-Palestinian protests, a spokesman for the Headquarters for Commemorating Martyrs of the Global Islamic Movement said the movement signed up at least 4,000 new volunteers.

Mohammad Ali Samadi, the spokesman, told The Associated Press the group had no ties to the government.

And Iranian Foreign Ministry spokesman Hamid Reza Asefi told reporters recently that the group's campaign to sign up volunteers for suicide attacks had "nothing to do with the ruling Islamic establishment."

"That some people do such a thing is the result of their sentiments. It has nothing to do with the government and the system," Asefi said.

That's plain good enough for us. Obviously the Iranians feel strongly about detonating themselves. And it's not like the ayatollahs have much say over the crazy freewheeling Iranian polity. They'll do anything for that Allah tingle.

The first meeting was held in the offices of the Martyrs Foundation, a semiofficial organization that helps the families of those killed in the 1980-88 Iran-Iraq war or those killed fighting for the government on other fronts. It drew hard-line lawmaker Mahdi Kouchakzadeh [Mr. Kouchakzadeh, a former member of the elite hard-line Revolutionary Guards, drew public attention when he led chants of "Death to America" during the opening session of the parliament last May.] and Gen. Hossein Salami [Mr. Salami, who asks not to be confused with the savory sandwich meat ("I am not savory. [Lightly laughs.] Many people think me decidedly un-savory." Draws his OTs-33 "Pernach" and presses the cool machined barrel into the center of our forehead. Point taken.) was the spokesperson for the Ashura war games this September where Iran tested new missile technology.] of the elite Revolutionary Guards.

"This group spreads valuable ideas," Kouchakzadeh told AP.

"At a time when the U.S. is committing the crimes we see now, deprived nations have no weapon other than martyrdom. It's evident that Iran's foreign policy makers have to take the dignified opinions of this group into consideration," said Kouchakzadeh, who also is a former member of the Revolutionary Guards.

Blowing up Americans, Israelis, and Book-of-the-Month darlings, these are valuable ideas indeed.

Samadi claimed 30,000 volunteers have signed up, and 20,000 of them have been chosen for training. Volunteers had already carried out suicide operations against military targets inside Israel, he said.

But he said discussing attacks against U.S. troops in Iraq "will cause problems for the country's foreign policy. It will have grave consequences for our country and our group. It's confidential."

In his widely published book of religious directives, Khomeini says: "If an enemy invades Muslim countries and borders, it's an obligation for all Muslims to defend through any possible means: sacrificing life and properties."

Samadi said: "With this religious verdict, we don't need anybody's permission to fight an enemy that has occupied Muslim lands."

Yeah. And big stupid Satan blogs all this like a big stupid joke.

The West would do well to take heed of Mr. bin Laden's aphorism about the strong horse and weak horse. It's a sure bet the Iranians aren't impressed with Europe's handling of a shrimp fork or its taste in pouch purses. The Middle East only respects the strong horse.

The West mopes around the negotiating table hoping to be loved. Theocratic Iran will never love the West, and the more the West sniffles and opens up its little heart, the less the Islamites respect it. Please note that even boom-boom booster Mr. Samadi recognizes what a totally different proposition blowing up Americans has become. It's not because America is much worried about being loved by Iran. It has everything to do with who the Iranians know they can skunk. And who they can't.

These suckers are ready to strap serious trouble to an army of self-detonating zombies. The zombies aren't on the negotiating table. Hey, big stupid Satan, no joke.