NYC Letter: A Heartbeat Away...

Today, Vote

First, a reminder. Most polling stations close around 8:00P. If you haven't voted, vote. Now back to the post.

People often think we simply name-call when we say Joe Biden is an idiot. Some think we kid that Joe Biden is our foremost objection to an Obama presidency. [Pause.] We aren't and we aren't. He is an idiot. [Pause.] And a political whore. [Pause.] But that actually worries us less.

I never make any big, big gaffes. I mean, you guys love saying that about me, but I tell you what, just look at the numbers. I don’t have any problem with what I’ve said and there’s nothing I’ve said that I would back off of.

Joe "Hi-Q" Biden,
giving his authorized assessment of himself
November 3, 2008 (ABC)

Joe's boast is he "never made any big, big gaffes". You know, like the doctor who boasts he doesn't kill too many patients.

This struck us as "big, big":

When we kicked -- along with France, we kicked Hezbollah out of Lebanon, I said and Barack said, "Move NATO forces in there. Fill the vacuum, because if you don't know -- if you don't, Hezbollah will control it." Now what's happened? Hezbollah is a legitimate part of the government in the country immediately to the north of Israel.

Maybe Joe considers this a misinformed fairy tale, which disqualifies it as a gaffe.

We also thought this "big, big":

With regard to Iraq, I indicated it would be a mistake to -- I gave the president the power. I voted for the power because he said he needed it not to go to war but to keep the United States, the UN in line, to keep sanctions on Iraq and not let them be lifted.

The bill, H.J.Res.114, Mr. Biden voted for was titled "Authorization for Use of Military Force Against Iraq Resolution of 2002", that was his first clue. The authorization (§3.a.1-2) reads:

The President is authorized to use the Armed Forces of the United States as he determines to be necessary and appropriate in order to:

(1) defend the national security of the United States against the continuing threat posed by Iraq; and

(2) enforce all relevant United Nations Security Council resolutions regarding Iraq.

We would call that the dinger, when the little foreign policy "expert" bell in Mr. Biden's big brain should have gone "ding".

And here is Joe on Meet the Press, August 4, 2002:

RUSSERT: If the president of the United States [scil., Bill Clinton] was saying four years ago clear evidence of mass destruction, do we have any choice but to eliminate Saddam Hussein and the threat?

BIDEN: We have no choice but to eliminate the threat.

So maybe VP candidate Joe is just outright fibbing about his support for the war. A lie, but, again, not a gaffe.

Finally from Meet the Press, September 7, 2008, this seemed glaringly "big, big" to us:

BROKAW: Here you were, just one year ago, on MEET THE PRESS. This was your take on the surge at that time, so let's listen to that, Senator.

"I mean, the truth of the matter is" "this administration's policy and the surge are a failure," you said, "and that the surge, which was supposed to stop sectarian violence and - long enough to give political reconciliation, there has been no political reconciliation."

Then you went on to say earlier in the year, "General Petraeus believes that it is a good idea, the surge. He may be the only one who believes that. Virtually no one else believes it's a good idea." Well, at the time, John McCain did, and all the indications are the surge has worked up to a point. It's not a victory...but the conditions are in place, and Anbar province...where there had been so much difficulty, the Iraqis now have taken over that province. We have brigades that have Sunnis and Shia serving side by side fighting the terrorists. But it's a process, and it's beginning, and the surge made that possible, did it not?

BIDEN: No. The surge helped make that--what made is possible in Anbar province is they did what I'd suggested two and a half years ago: gave local control. They turned over and they said to the Sunnis in Anbar province, "We promise you, don't worry, you're not going to have any Shia in here. There's going to be no national forces in here. We're going to train your forces to help you fight al-Qaeda." And that you--what you had was the awakening. The awakening was not an awakening by us, it was an awakening of the Sunnis in Anbar province willing to fight.

It takes a lot of twisting and magic tequila shots to see the surge in the Biden Iraq plan. It was never remotely conceived of as a surge. If it had been, well, wouldn't've Joe recognized his own ideas in the surge policy and supported it, not opposed it?

Maybe VP candidate Joe just considers this self-aggrandizing horse hockey. Bullshit, but, again, not a gaffe. [Pause.] Fairy tales. Lies. Bullshit. But no "big, big" gaffes. [We search the stars.] He's an idiot.

Well, tomorrow we won't have Joe Biden to kick around anymore, so we give one last glimpse of his big brain unbridled.

BIDEN OFFERS HIS TAKE ON GIRLS

LEE'S SUMMIT, Missouri November 3, 2008 (Fox) - "Hey folks, 37 more hours!" ... Telling voters in this swing state that "change is on the way," the Democratic vice presidential candidate offered one of his now-expected random introductory tangents.

The latest was about his sister, Val, his wife Jill, and Missouri Sen. Claire McCaskill, who introduced the Bidens at the rally of 1,100 people in the gym at Longview Community College.

You know why I think Jill likes Claire McCaskill so well, Senator McCaskill? Jill is one of five sisters, Claire is one of three sisters. And I tell you what, you women raised with sisters are different than women raised with brothers," Biden said as both women joined him on stage.

My sister is smart, runs every one of my campaigns; is beautiful; graduated with honors from college; is homecoming queen. But she's a ... she is what I call a 'girl-boy' growing up, you know what I mean?

And I tell you what? Girl-girls are tougher than girl-boys. But there's one important thing I noticed.The great thing about marrying into a family with five sisters, there's always one that loves you. 'Cause you can count on splitting them a bit. You know what I mean?

I shouldn't be going off like this, but -- hey, folks, 37 more hours, 37 more hours.

Mercifully, we are spared and Joe denied at the polls.

Posted by Damian at November 4, 2008 07:15 PM